Death - A Learning Lesson

One of my co-workers died suddenly while I was in Atlanta. Upon returning I attended her viewing. She had been legally blind, a real spitfire in life and her accomplishments were amazing. She was very adventurous with a rebellious streak. She was a recovering alcoholic and sponsored many others. She was also a breast cancer survivor. Her parents are very religious and I'm sure her life style and choices had caused them grief. I had just been her manager and there were days when she could bring me to my wits end. It was very evident at the viewing that her parents had lost touch with who and how amazing she really was. Her father had handled all the arrangements, the picture in her obituary was taken in the early 1980's, the pictures depicting her life posted at the viewing (a common practice in Utah) were all when she was very young or in her 20's to early 30's. There were only two recent pictures of her and they were both from a distance.

My dear sweet husband went with me to the viewing and I learned a lot on the planning of funerals and viewings from his comments. I'm going to share his comments and my observations as it was very evident that for hers, she was not there to plan. Here are my observations:

Steve: She looked terrible, how old was she 50?
Observation: Post a variety of pictures showing your age progression at the viewing.

Steve: She had to be at least your age; her face looked as old as yours.
Learned: He has a death wish, remember to post only pictures of him when he was young, had all of his hair and there was no gray in it at all.

Steve: Why did she look so old, after looking at all the pictures I expected to see a really young person not an old one, are you sure she was 53?
Observation: He's 53, doesn’t he look in a mirror, he’s getting very annoying, aging is a process and death is not becoming.

Steve: I thought you said she wasn't religious, why did they put her in temple clothes? Don't you dare do that to me!
Goal: Live longer than him and bury him in what looks like Temple clothes---never mind the part he said about haunting you for the rest of your natural life--it would be worth it in the end.